Playdoh, Legos and Stoichiometry

2012-02-15T19:17:00.000-08:00

MIGRAINE SEASON?
There is something to be said for record keeping over a period of years. I've just spent most of the past 2 days in pain from a migraine. Somewhere along the way I noticed the date, and began to to put some ideas together. For several year snow, it seems that somewhere between mid Feb and mid March I get slammed with at least one and usually 2-4 stubborn evil multi-day migraines. I'm beginning to wonder if there isn't some sort of stackable trigger component here. Is it the beginnings of pollen? Or that by this time of year my Vit D is ludicrously stupidly low ?(Just found that part out this week) Last year the tip over into migraine hell was bronchitis, in almost exactly the same time frame. The year before, I think it might have been the blooming stuff. I can't prove any of this. Stackable triggers are vague and unpredictable. One combo might get you a couple hours of misery where a single dose of meds does the trick, some other combo is whammy hell and leads to casting fond glances at the ER where I can get MgS04 by IV. (I'm still thinking I might end up there before the week is out.)

2012-02-09T10:22:00.000-08:00

THE EYEGLASSES SAGA CONTINUES
Find a sane optometrist on the 4th try. Check. Get a rx for distance glasses that seems to make sense. Check. Glasses I can wear? Um, not yet. I take a certain amount of responsibility for this, for being a wuss and not putting my foot down. I let the lady at the optometrist con me into ordering a pair of glasses with frames along the top instead of the rimless kind which the only kind my eyes can tolerate. Why on earth I let this happen is a mix of reasons- they don't carry the rimless kind and I was happy that the optometrist was sane and willing to work with me. I caved. So stupid.

It took almost an entire month to even get the glasses. I wore them one day. Exactly one day. In 3 little 20 minutes chunks. And then I paid, and paid and paid with about 18hrs of migraine pain.

There's a whole set of things wrong with that pair of glasses. #1- the bar across the top (i.e. the rimmed frame) blocks about the upper 30% of my vision field. # 2- that wonderous bar reflects down into the arcs of exposed glass on the lower edge and combines to give me what amounts to almost tunnel vision. # 3- They were supposed to change colors, as in the transitions- gets darker with light- idea. Well... they sort of did, after 20 minutes in full sunlight and not at all in the car. Considering I got these things to improve my clarity when driving... having no darkening was a BIG problem. I am so chronically photophobic I ought to qualify for vampire-hood. I wear my sunglasses probably 35-40 hrs a week, sometimes inside and sometimes at night. #4 - when I walked into the parking garage to drive home that night it was like looking through a fly-eye. The 4 rows of overhead lights had magically become about 30 rows. I actually had to take off the glasses to walk to my van without losing my balance.

All in all, it was a disaster. But it doesn't get any better, because even though I've returned the glasses this morning, my insurance will take weeks to fix. The timeline goes like this: 3-5 days for bad pair to get mailed back to manufacturer + 10 or more days for insurance company to credit my account + 2-4 weeks to get someplace else to create a new pair. And that's if everything goes according to plan! Add that up and the best case scenario is that I MIGHT be able to get another pair in a month. More realistically it's gonna be 2-3 months.

2012-02-04T18:53:00.000-08:00

QUEEN OF THE IMPULSE BUY
The hubby and I often take months to come to decisions on which appliance to buy and which gadget. I think we started talking about the recent TV purchase about a year ago, and actively began hunting around for it 3 months ago and eventually rolled around to buying it a week after Xmas this year.

My usual price limit on "I want it and I want it now" usually hovers around $20. Call it an act of desperation (because I'm tired of listening to the bad bass thud of the asshat neighbors next door 8-10 hours a night) or call it a moment of weakness, or maybe it's should be labeled hormonal insanity.

I bought a subwoofer. I bought a Klipsch 350 Watt subwoofer.

The last straw in this momentary lapse in sanity was listening to one of my fave european techno musicians, Basshunter, and realizing my stereo has close to no actual bass whatsoever. (I usually tend to listen to my music on my headphones) If I'm listening to Basshunter, I want to FEEL the beat. We went to Best Buy this afternoon and spent a whopping 20ish minutes punching buttons in the speaker aisle. The moment I pushed the one that vibrated my feet---it was lust. "I want that one."

I think the sales dude was amused when I told him I like Bassuhunter. He even offered to sell me the 500 Watt one. (I did draw the line at that level of crazy.)

DH got it all hooked up and holy crap .... Privjet Russia sounds amazing! Okay so I'm crazy, but it's fun kind of crazy.

2012-02-01T07:47:00.000-08:00

MAN HOURS
There's just no accounting for how my brain works. Groupon sent me a advert for 3 man hours of cleaning for a particlaur price. Immediately my brain starts wondering are they really going to send a man to clean my house? Oh wow, that would be cool and has all sorts of plot bunny possibilities. He could move furniture and vaccuum behind it and stuff. Would he wear a maid's outfit? Okay, brain lock on that one. How 'bout jeans and really tight white t-shirt...
Then I got to the second part of that the ad. -----A 49-point cleaning checklist helps the team to stay focused throughout the service, guiding them from room to room as they tick the boxes next to "disinfect sinks," "vacuum carpets," and "polish glassware in Frankensteinian underground laboratory."---
Really? You'd polish my glassware? There are days when there is a lab in my kitchen, which unfortunately is not underground. Drat, maybe that how they get out of actually having to do the aforementioned task.
The last part of the ad claims they guarantee 24 hrs worth of cleanliness after the visit. Say what? I have 2 kids, 2 cats and a husband who has rocket parts all over the library. Do these people cast a magic spell? Or is there duct tape involved? Hmmm, maybe I need to look into this.

2012-01-20T08:28:00.000-08:00

NO "I"'S FOR ME

The latest senseless stupidity of the Apple/Mac empire is impication that if you use their software or app thing to create an ebook, they get a have some form of ownership on that creation. It doesn't appear that it's sufficient that the customer had to purchase the app. Noooo, big daddy corporate giant wants a slice of your profits too.

I am blissfully happy to say I don't own an "I" anything. No pads, no phones, no desktops, no ipods, no apps. Nada. And I probably never will. Any corporation that exerts that psycho level of control over everything they produce will ever get a dime of my money.

2012-01-12T08:50:00.000-08:00

WIN A FREE COPY OF DROWNING IN YOU

Over on my website, I'm giving away a free copy of my new Cobblestone Press release called Drowning in You

Matt Pulaski and Declan Foster are DEA agents in San Diego. When Declan nearly dies during a raid, Matt volunteers to keep an eye on his adrenalin junkie partner. Declan’s near death experience causes him to reevaluate his life. In his bucket list are some urges that he’s been suppressing. Fortunately, Matt is willing to help. Declan’s newly recognized feelings come as a surprise, and he’s pretty confused. Being a DEA agent is no walk in the park. Danger is always around the corner and bigotry doesn’t tend to be too far away even if things are changing.

http://cobblestone-press.com/catalog/books/drowning.htm

2012-01-10T09:04:00.000-08:00

THE PERILS OF KINDLE... OR IS THAT KINDL-ING?

I got a Kindle for Christmas. Yeah, I've been oh so slow to jump on the bandwagon of using an e-reader. Kind of funny I suppose for an author that uses the e-publishing world extensively. It's not like I don't read other people e-books ;) I do. I've just been doing it on my laptop for the past few years.

Now I have a gadget, a gadget that allows me to surf Amazon and download a book with the touch of one button and the book is delivered to the Kindle in about 60 seconds. O...M....G... Talk about the advent of instant gratification. I confess I don't read as much as I used to, (too busy writing) but I still have a tendency to binge read at times. Gee, that sounded like a weight watchers confession. It's just a little scary that I could blow a whole lot of money in a really short time if the notion struck me.

2011-12-31T11:53:00.000-08:00

2011 - The year of the knee...among other things

How did I spend my year? There were countless hours of PT and a 4th injury to the already trashed knee. I fought my way through the monumental stupidity of the medical establishment: a crazed dentist, a blind and crazy radiologist and ten other clueless people.

On better and more succesful fronts I had 7 different pieces published, re-released 2 older pieces on Kindle and re-pitched a story originally contracted by a publisher that went out of business. I have 2 pieces already under contract for 2012 and a whole bunch of WIP pieces that will probably get pitched over the coming months.

My kids are deep into another year of being homeschooled and my "day" job at the college cranks steadily onward.

I guess that brings around the topic of resolutions .... I hope to write more, ride more, read more and avoid wrecking my knee any further.

2011-12-24T07:13:00.000-08:00

TWAS THE DAY BEFORE xMAS AND CURRY IS PLANNED
New Christmas eve tradition here. Curry on Xmas eve. The idea got spawned last year when we were in Bath, England - land of gorgeous architecture and curry delivery. We were utterly exhausted after a hard day of shopping and holiday prep so Indian food seemed like a plan. It was awesome. Nobody delivers good Indian food around here (even though there is a place we could go pick it up) so I'm making curry and may try my hand at making naan from scratch.

2011-12-14T05:48:00.000-08:00

Naughty: Mandatory Fun, a Torquere Menage story
Starting at: $1.99
by AR Moler

The head of Special Investigative Services, John Benchley, dreads the holiday season. During the autumn of the last two years, he’s lost two friends and fellow agents: one to a senseless robbery and one to the predations of a supernatural being that SIS was created to combat. The last thing he wants to do right now is participate in the mandatory Yuletide interagency bash. In particular, he’d really, really like to avoid an old hook-up, the man-eating Madison Carthage. Gabrielle Dichenz and Evan Garrett, his current lovers, promise him a reward for being a good boy and hanging in there. Sexy grown-up presents are good; love and support are better. John’s Christmas season just might take a turn for the better this year.

http://www.torquerebooks.com/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=79_108&products_id=3437

You can also swing by my website and leave me some email at the addy there. I'll be giving away a free copy on the 21st of December.

2011-12-12T10:26:00.000-08:00

BAKING AND BAKING AND BAKING
Lots of little gifts of homemade sweets get given away by me nearly every holiday season. The down side to this is the amount of time I spend making them. I've already used almost half of my 25 lbs of flour. Somewhere around 4 lbs of oatmeal has been consumed. I think there's been 2 lbs of butter and more than a pound of almonds made to vanish. And I'm not done yet.

Italian chocolate cookies, almond biscotti, oatmeal cookies, and oatmeal-scotchies...

2011-12-09T13:14:00.000-08:00

THE UPDATE
Coastal Vision's manager dude did call back today. "This is Coastal Vision I need your credit card number so I can issue a credit." No apology. No explanation. No "unfortunately we cannot serve you as a customer". Just plain rude, obnoxious and incompetent like rest of the place. I'm actually vaguely surprised that he didn't tell me fuck off. People of the 'net- Avoid this place like the plague.

2011-12-08T16:55:00.000-08:00

GLASSES- THE DISASTER 2011 EDITION

I went for an eye exam, only because I'd noticed a little fuzziness in the left eye and thought a little tweak in the prescription would fix it. Riiiiiight. Cue the clusterfuck music. I explained to Dr. Wang (yeah that's his name and he acted like one too) exhaustively about how any attempts to correct the astigmatism in my left eye caused motion sickness, and pain and eventually a migraine. And also how my nervous system never ever adjusts, because scientist that I am, I tried a whole batch of different solutions. (My eventual fix was a series of cheap online ordered Rx glasses that changed my left eye vision 0.25 at a time WITHOUT any astigmatism correction, and it worked pretty damn well. Truthfully I should have just gambled another $20 on a new pair with a 0.25 bump and my life would have been a whole hell of a lot simpler.)

It was like talking to a brick wall. Wang gave me some enormous line of bullshit about how a correction that was too weak would cause too many problems. (Dude, I've been using the glasses I've got for months and months now with no problems except a trace a blur in the left eye) I also explained in miles and miles of detail that if he gave me a Rx more than 0.25 or so different that the one I had, I would have the same motion sickness/ pain/ migraine problems for MONTHS. Still- talk the brick wall. I finally gave up and left, assuming with great trusting stupidity that they would give me a Rx. I had to ask/demand it. My insurance doesn't cover their office anyway and there was no way I was paying full price for glasses that would never work. They also told me my pupilary distance was a proprietary secret that they could not possibly impart to me.

I walked out to the van before I actually read the Rx. WTF!!!! It had massive astigmatism correction and the wrong name on the top. marched back in and told them about both problems. They eventually presnted me with a script with the correct name and "A" rx without astigmatism that was still so wrong I could never possibly get it filled. What part of "I CANNOT CHANGE MORE THAN 0.25-0.0 IN ONE JUMP" does that moron not understand?

I have since been on the phone to the office manager twice and still haven't gotten a resolution to this problem in any way.

It astounds me- the level of bull headed stupidity. We're talking 2 hunks of ground plastic in a frame. I still meet the 20/40 requirement for driving, so why the hell should it make a difference if I'm willing to buy multiple pairs of glasses to correct my vision in a gradual way?

I went ahead and ordered a pair of reading glasses, only 0.25 different from what I have, and a pair of distance glasses with a very small left correction from my fav online place (Thank you Eye Buy Direct) and will continue titrating my eyes in small increments until I'm happy with the view. Why? Because I expect to be totally screwed over from any resolution by the optometry office. If they pony up and actually agree to help I will be totally amazed.

2011-12-05T07:06:00.001-08:00

BAH HUMBUG AND ALL THAT

I am so not in the Christmas mood this week. I haven't got but maybe a tenth of the shopping done and no decorations put up and no tree yet either. Tomorrrow is FINAL EXAM day. Grrrr. Tis the season for melting your brain on grading papers.

Last year was fabulously liberating. We left the country. 95% of shopping was done is a whirlwind melt the numbers off your credit card spending spree in Bath. No tree, no decorating, no cards. Instead it was fighting the lines at Marks and Spencer to buy lamb and brussel sprouts. And guess what everybody brings their own bags. I love the UK. (Had to endure the clerk at Walmart look at me like I'd lost my mind Saturday when I said I had my own bags and didn't want 34 flimsy plastic ones)

Stonehenge in the snow and rickshaws pulled by flying sharks... aaaaah. Xmas in the UK was fab.

2011-11-30T08:22:00.000-08:00

NANO FAIL
Here I am on the last day of November and I've only cranked out a little over 34K words. I made it more than halfway, and a lot of the plot lines produced this month are pretty good, if a bit typo riddled. I have managed roughly half of the 4th SIS novel and gotten a little closer to finished on the novella starring Cam and Mason (there's still two scenes unwritten.) Along the way I also did edits for the SIS holiday short called - "Mandatory Fun". It's due to come out on December 14th.

2011-11-13T12:48:00.000-08:00

17 THOUSAND WORDS AND STILL COUNTING
I've been cranking. I'm 13K or so into book 4 of the SIS series, and 2 out of the four missing scenes in the Cam and Mason novella got written. A certain amount of thrashing through the edges of some other projects has occurred too. Only 33K left to go. (Along with my sanity)

2011-10-30T15:24:00.000-07:00

NANO APPROACH-ETH

Halloween is nearly upon us. The northeast got snowed on, and thoughts turn to... how the hell I'm going to crank out 50,000 words in 30 days and come out the other end with something like sanity.

I have several "in progess" things that need working on and I'm trying to wrap my head around the next SIS novel. Per usual, my intention is to split the word count between a batch of different projects, cuz I get stuck. There are plans for mayhem and kidnapping and sex and romance and gunfire and stabbings and explosions... Well okay not all in one story but...

Will I start writing at the crack of midnight Nov 1? Maybe.

2011-10-25T06:57:00.000-07:00

YES ON GIRL COOTIES
Nomeclature leads to oxidation numbers leads to molecular geometry... oops wrong sequence... and yet not really. I write menage, (and m/m and m/f). All my menage is the m/m/f variety, which means the guys have as much of a relationship as the hetero components. I am left head scratching once again as to why a segment of readers seem pissed as hell that the 2 guys from the SIS Case Files fall in love with a woman in book 2 and evolve to a full menage by book 3. Clue =I wrote book 2 first.

Long ago and not far away...Now I Could Drink Hot Blood was written and self pubbed with all the m/m scenes behind closed doors because I underestimated the acceptability of menage. Only later did I write the book where John and Evan meet, and then got around to a partial rewrite of the 2nd book. Book 3 is out this month and the triangle is complete and still evolving. I am sorry that some readers are annoyed but this character set was never ever destined to be just the 2 guys.

Hint dropping is about to occur........ Rough plot bunnies are breeding for Book 4, and yes the full menage continues.

2011-10-19T10:17:00.000-07:00

AWASH IN THE BUSY-NESS

So here I am in the middle of October, swamped with stuff and stuff and more stuff yet to do. All the kid-related commitments are going nearly full blast and my lastest novel just came out so there's promos to be done. Throw in the novella I'm supposed to be editting, and the serial fiction that's destined to be a free read on my website along with the never ending knee problems... I want to run away. A full 24hours would be good. A week would be better. Alone (well, okay, me and my laptop) And NanoWriMo is approaching. Cue the the "Jaws" music.

2011-10-11T08:23:00.000-07:00

ALL ABOUT THE VISUALS
I confess, I usually pick some actor to be the visual for a character. Telling you who would probably get me into all sorts of copyright issues. I seldom use somebody I can only get static photos for, because the body motion plays a huge part. Yeah, okay I go for HAWT and ripped most of the time, but only certain people fit into certain roles in my head. I troll youtube looking for vids of the actors in motion. I want to see the smile happening, or the frown. I want to see the walk or the run or the hand motion. The kinetics are important in my head.

2011-10-05T12:42:00.000-07:00

STROKES WITHOUT PAIN
I've been enduring PT for my wrecked knee. PT either stands for physical torture or pain and tears. I am having a hard time believing that that anything that hurts that bad can be beneficial. This week I'm skipping PT because I'm just plain pissed at the level of pain they induce. I went swimming today instead,and I don't mean just wading around the pool. I did 10 laps. Granted that's not a lot, but 250 yards worth of flutter kicks and scissor kicks made my horribly deteriorated quads and hamstrings good and tired, only slightly achy, without actually crossing over into pain. Somebody needs to explain to me why PT seems to be fixated on the no pain-no gain concept. I thought that idea died in the 1980's?

2011-10-04T12:17:00.000-07:00

AIR, EYRE, AFFAIR...
This past week I've been on a bender of sorts. I got the new Jane Eyre movie from Netflix starring Michael Fassbender. Oh just yummy... It also occured to me that I've seen 3 different versions of the movie but never read the actual book. Cue Project Guttenberg. It took about 60 seconds to download and I've plowed through about 1/3 of it so far. Then I ran across a listing for a sci-fi book called The Eyre Affair. The blurb reads just a little bit like Simon Hawke's Time wars books. So this time I voyaged to the public library to pick up a copy. I haven't started it yet, probably this weekend.

2011-09-27T06:29:00.001-07:00

Falling From a Height by A.R. Moler

Navy SEAL and Division P operative Jonas Nightengale is sent to Ft. Detrick, MD to determine who tried to divert a highly secret experimental missile. Sergeant Sarah Quilleran is in charge of security for the weapon and is overseeing the site where the missile landed—“in” the side of a cliff. The weapon is unstable where in hangs embedded in the rocks, so that when Jonas and Sarah rappel down to take a look, the unthinkable happens. Sarah’s rope is cut by a sharp piece of metal from the missile. What’s a girl to do? Pray for a savior with fast reflexes?

One attempt to steal the missile thwarted, the mystery traitor is determined to keep on until he achieves success. Sarah and Jonas find their lives increasing threatened as they draw closer to finding the truth. Will a heady mix of sexual attraction and shared psychic talents be enough to keep them alive long enough to solve the problem?

Now available on Kindle
http://www.amazon.com/Falling-From-a-Height-ebook/dp/B005NRF4OM/ref=sr_1_4?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1316378168&sr=1-4

2011-09-23T19:36:00.000-07:00

SUSPENSION OF DISBELIEF
I read to my kids frequently. Sometimes it's classical kid stuff like Alice in Wonderland or The Secret Garden. Other times it's more light - Nancy Drew and lately James and the Giant Peach.

We're not that far into the book yet. Having just past the point where the monster mutant peach grows to full size and James crawls into the peach via the tunnel late one night.

After getting through the description of the huge bugs who are talking to James, DS asks "How come there's furntture inside the peach pit?" Uh, um, of all of the details to lock onto, such as the talking insects or the 30 foot high peach or crawling inside the peach --- he wants to know why there's furniture. Head ** desk.

2011-09-02T11:17:00.000-07:00

MATH & MORE

All the public school kids in our area are destined to go back to school on Tuesday. For mine, Tuesday merely represents the first day of co-op (some extra curricular classes they take once a week). DD has already completed 55% of her 3rd grade math, despite the fact she's technically not a 3rd grader until Tuesday. DS is plowing through a History of Virginia textbook. We're also going to take a stab at Latin this year. (insert eye roll here) I'm really uncertain how that's likely to go.

2011-08-30T07:38:00.000-07:00

NEW STUFF OUT & OLDER THINGS RE-ISSUED

The next installment in the Inches of Trust series is out - Pulling the Pin.

Brian is overseeing the remodel of a 40’s era home when he and his crew find
someone’s souvenir from World War II: a grenade. When Tristan, Brian’s cop
boyfriend, stops by with a friend from the bomb squad to check and see if
their find is the real deal, Tristan gets a whole different perspective on
Brian. A hardhat, work boots, denim and flannel are not just a whole lot of
sexy on the normally more professionally dressed Brian, they are kind of
tough looking too. Maybe Brian can handle all the parts of Tristan’s life,
even the tough bits. Sometimes, the small things can lead to some pretty big
changes.

Get your copy today:
http://www.torquerebooks.com/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=79_93&products_id=3267

Hell Dogs Squadron is now available as a single title too.

Navy F/A-18 pilot Lt. Cameron Bradshaw juggles a second government job in
addition to his military commitments. He's a psychic finder for a mysterious
agency known as Division P. Just as he starts the next Division P
assignment, nearly lethal motorcycle accident nearly takes his life.

If not for the talents of gifted healer Dr. Mason Flynn, the Lt. might be
dead. As the slow process of recovery begins, Mason Flynn is drawn to the
injured pilot. A mix of shared psychic talents and physical attraction
slowly binds them together, but the people responsible for Cam's accident
escalate the affair, and soon Mason is running for his life.

A mad impromptu flight to Meridian Naval Air Station leads Cam and naval
intelligence to a direct confrontation with a group of missile thieves. A
vicious firefight leaves Mason scrambling to save teammates, but the final
endgame forces Mason to do the unthinkable, and put his own sanity in
jeopardy in the process. Can Cameron and Mason survive the trials thrown at
them and their burgeoning relationship?

Originally published as the Chaser series Hell Dog Squadron.

Get your copy today:
http://www.torquerebooks.com/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=97&products_id=3266

I'm also hip deep in trying to finish a batch of new stuff. Keep an eye open for updates.

2011-08-25T07:06:00.000-07:00

SWAMP FIRE,EARTHQUAKE, HURRICANE ....

Life's been a bit wild and crazy around here. North Carolina is having swamp fires. Apparently this happens and it causes amazing smoke that drifts for miles including into other states, i.e. Virginia. Tuesday we had an earthquake - in Virginia. WTF? And now there's a hurricane headed our way, that may or may not side-swipe us enough to do some major damage. What comes next- the locust plague?

2011-08-16T10:22:00.000-07:00

IT GETS STUPIDER YET

Finally after poking the medical establishment for two whole weeks with a sharp stick, I got a re-read of my MRI (the one with the creative writing assignment for a report) The phrase "fuck-up" just really doesn't do it justice. I have an MCL sprain, two mensical cysts - that indicate 84-96% probability of meniscus tears on both medial and lateral sides, and a fracture that is now healed. All of these findings dovetail with the location and severity of my pain. They also support my accupuncturist's belief in the meniscus damage altho he suspected hamstring vs MCL damage as the 2nd component.(So he was off by a half inch or so)

This then also stirs up the concept that the MRI screwed up the last scan too, because it implies they missed a fracture from the last injury. If I, the lowly biochemist, can figure out there was something decidedly wrong about my knee, you'd think some ortho could manage the same. Of course that would require him to listen to my observations and not treat me like just one more in a line of cattle.

Moo.

2011-08-15T05:15:00.000-07:00

MAGIC REGROWING MENISCUS
More tales of stupidity regarding the medical establishment and my knee. I have spend what seems like eons on the phone being told doctor after doctor will NOT even see me for my knee pain since the fall. Half the problem seems to be the MRI I had done. 20 years ago I had a nice hefty chunk of my meniscus removed from my knee - as in gone, absent, is no more. The latest mri "claims" my medial meniscus is "intact." WTF? Phone call after phone call has only yield assertions that the report is correct (with hemming and hawing that the claim refers to WHAT'S LEFT of my meniscus). I think it's bullshit, but nobody believes me. They all claim I have arthritis -yes I know and that has exactly what to do with falling down the stairs?

It took 3 entire weeks to see an othropedic surgeon. The guy's CV is shorter than mine. Dr. Louis Jordan is an incompetent moron who treated me like I had two brain cells. I swear if I'd been a little older and a little grayer he would have patted me on the head and told me I just needed to adjust to getting old. After telling him I'd tried Voltaren in gel and tablet form - neither of which helped much with the pain, he wrote me a script for Arthratec (but only after telling me Celebrex was too expenisive and I couldn't possibly want to try Indocin like he thought I was pulling names out of a hat.) It took me less than 30 seconds to find out Arthratec is the exact same damn drug as Voltaren. Is he really that fucking stupid? Or does he think I am?

Please Goddess I need Dr. House. I'd trade crappy attitude for intelligence any day.

2011-08-07T07:22:00.000-07:00

AND THE WINNER IS

Alberta Jenn - please contact me at amyrmoler at gmail dot com to arrange delivery of a copy of Don't Fret the Timing

2011-07-31T07:09:00.000-07:00

WIN A COPY OF - DON'T FRET THE TIMING

Leave me a comment and I'll be giving away a free copy on the 7th of August!

2011-07-24T06:15:00.000-07:00

THE NEVER ENDING KNEE SAGA
I have screwed up my knee yet again,so here comes the tale-which sounds like a cross between a soap opera and a slap-stick comedy.

Wednesday morning I woke up at 5 am with a migraine. Nothing new there, even now that they're mostly under control, sleep deprivation and such can still trigger them. The almighty heat wave is going on around here too. I lay in bed squinting at the ceiling for a few minutes trying to decide which med choice I wanted, and realizing the A/C unit was only running outside and not the one inside. Joy. Our heat pump/AC is a temperamental thing and when this happens you have to turn it off and back on. What does that have to do with my knee? Wait for it...

So I decide I will hoof it down the stairs and fuss with the A/C before I choke down meds. I made it 3/4 of the way down the stairs and... totally missed the last two steps. I wiped out in a semi-spectacular fashion ending up in a heap on the floor with one hand still clutching the banister. Pain. Pain. Pain.

After a few tears and some really choice curses, I limped my way back up the stairs. (Oh yeah and I fixed the A/C problem too) Two hours later when I had to get up it still hurt - a lot. I limped my way through the day, with my whopping big knee brace and my cane. By the next morning I began to wonder if I had torn something new. Stupidly, oh so stupidly, I went to doc-in-a-box (aka Patient First) thinking they could give me an opinion on whether it was wrecked. They took X-rays, proclaimed it - "not broken" and said that was all they could do for me. And it took them 3 fucking hours to do this. Cue more stupidity now.

They made me an appt with some ortho I didn't know at a time I could not possibly make it because I needed to pick up my daughter from science camp. When I told them I couldn't make it they said I needed to do was call and change the time. I told them repeatedly that my last ortho appt took 11 weeks to schedule. I was told that was not possible, nobody ever had to wait that long.

Cue reality. I spent most the afternoon on the phone with said ortho office who gave me a ration of shit about how since I had seen Dr. Schaffer once already, I HAD to see the same guy again because it was the same knee. (Apparently "I fell down the stairs yesterday and it's a new injury" doesn't make any difference) and I was offered the soonest appt available--- wait for it--- at the end of August, roughly 4 weeks in the future.

After yet more phone calls, I finally got the place that did my PRP last month to agree to have a quick look, on the same day even. The nice PA there did what I had expected the asshat at Patient First to do - the bendbendwobblewobble tests. Yeah I know there's actually names for the method that involves grasping my leg and applying pressure to the joint in various direction (drawer test and McMurry and a batch of other names) The verdict- no "Obvious" signs of torn ligaments, and I got some concrete instructions to use crutches till Monday, will weight bearing as tolerated and lots of ice and elevation.

It's a little better (Sunday morning) but not great. I'm wondering how many months it's going to take me to get past this latest injury.

2011-07-18T07:02:00.000-07:00

COOL BUT ODD

So I "got" sensory deprived. The place that does this has these giant pods that vaguely resemble a Dutch wooden shoe filled with highly saturated magnesium sulfate solution. You get a Dead Sea sort of floatation out of it. After somewhere between 20 minutes and 5 years of laying there floating in the darkness (lstening to the AC unit outside cycle on and off) I decided I felt half like a squid & half like a ghost. You know how when you watch a squid squirt their way along there's there odd fluidity to the motion? If I wiggled around in the liquid I would float sideways a bit and knock into one of the walls, but I could never predict which one. The ghost-y part I suppose had to do with the floating in roughly body temp liquid. I kept wondering if I put my hand on my leg or my body if it would just sort of pass right on through. Somewhere near the end of session I did notice that one ear ached a little. Maybe this was from the high salt content of the solution. If I do this again, I might avail myself of the earplugs offered. And I think my ear "leaks" cause later I realized I could taste the Mag sulfate in the back of my throat. I also noticed after I got out it felt like my time sense was totally messed up in a jet-lag-y, I'm not sure whether it aftenoon or evening sort of way. Very strange.

2011-07-15T13:12:00.000-07:00

ALTERED STATES -HERE I COME

Ever since the early 80's when I was in college I have been fascinated by the concept of sensory deprivation tanks. (Okay, so I'm weird) Altered States ranked in the top 5 of my favorite movies back then, and still ranks up there pretty high. I have attempted to fake my way through sensory dep a number of times over the years via luke warm bathtubs with the lights off and cushy beds/ light blankets/ head phones on versions. This weekend I get to experience the real deal! There's a new local place that has high tech epsom salt water filled pods. I jumped at the chance, and even got an appointment in for the weekend (just in case they go out of business soon because not everybody's as weird as me) I'll report in later on how it goes.

2011-07-13T10:17:00.000-07:00

TENTATIVE NEW COVER

I'm trying to learn to navigate the system over at the B&N website so that I can get the re-release of "Don't Fret the Timing" all set in gear.

2011-07-11T20:30:00.000-07:00

RE-RELEASE OF "DON'T FRET THE TIMING"

The Division P novella -Don't Fret the Timing" will be re-released through Barnes and Noble's Nook service next month. I'll give more details when this is all sorted out.

2011-07-09T08:40:00.000-07:00

SUMMER SLEEP DEPRIVATION
Anyone who believes summer is filled with long lazy days of nothing epic to do needs to spend a few weeks at my house. I will get your tushie out of bed at the obscene hour of 5:30 a.m. every Saturday for 7 weeks and command you to find your swim suit and your goggles. This is followed by 4-6 hours beside the pool in the blistering heat and humidity (and sometimes the rain), swimming races every 1/2 hr to 45 minutes.

Two weeks from now, it will be toting the girl child to science for 5 days straight, followed by toting the boy child to engineering camp for another 5 days. Maybe I can sleep in September.

2011-07-04T17:36:00.001-07:00

AND THE WINNER IS

rogcaprina --- I will be contacting you to arrange delivery

2011-07-01T17:52:00.001-07:00

"JUST" BREATHE" RELEASED AT SHADOWFIRE PRESS

Leave me a comment here on my blog and I'll pick a winner for a $5 SFP gift certificate on Monday the 4th of July.

2011-07-01T13:08:00.000-07:00

I PAY TAXES WHY? SO I CAN HARRASSED FOR BEING ON CRUTCHES.

I am seriously questioning why I ever thought joining the Virginia Beach Rec Centers was a sane idea.

Here's the letter I sent to the Powerthatbe at VB.gov----

Apparently this is my summer to be repeatedly denied normal and average accommodations for myself or my children. I am currently on crutches due to my most recent attempt to resolve long term injury damage to my knee. I spend several weeks a year on crutches because of my injuries. I very carefully called Bow Creek ahead of time to make sure that it was permissible for me to sit beside the pool to supervise my children as they did laps. I was told that this was allowed. After my children had begun their laps, I was told that I was not allowed in the pool area because of my street clothes and my inability to be in the pool with my children. We were told only my older child (12) could be allowed to swim and my daughter would have to leave. Since I considered this to be a monumentally stupid and discrimatory solution we left.

I spoke with two separate supervisors at Bow Creek who gave the impression that the left hand does not know what the right hand does or cares. I asked very pointedly what I was supposed to do. The answer – nothing. I pressed for an answer as to how more permanently disabled parents were supposed to deal with this situation. I was told they had never encountered such a situation before. I will be speaking with the US Dept of Justice’s ADA division regarding this matter. --------

I am just gobsmacked at the concept that these morons can so blatantly discriminate against a parent with a relatively minor disability. What happens to the parents who have more severe problems? We're not talking private corporation here. This is a city run facility, mostly financed by my tax dollars. My kids don't even use the public school system, and we pay those taxes too.

2011-06-30T09:52:00.000-07:00

PRP Part2
The first night was fucking BAD. There is no other way to adequately describe it. Pain so bad the Percocet might as well have been tic-tacs. I got pretty close to no sleep. Wednesday was spent on crutches for two reasons. 1- I couldn't bend the knee more than about 20 degrees and 2- full weight bearing was agony. I managed to make it to work and hobbled around on crutches all night. I had to take a taxi home because there was no way I could drive.

Last night wasn't quite so bad pain wise, but the trade off being that I got slammed by a migraine around 4 in the morning, a legacy of no sleep the night before. Today, I can tolerate a little more walking and it bends a little better, but I'm getting periodic stabs of "ice pick under the knee cap."

2011-06-28T14:41:00.000-07:00

PRP - THE EVENT
They drew 20 ml of blood. I was slightly surprised I thought it would require more. They have a centifuge based gadget for getting rid of most of the unwanted parts of the blood sample. Thumb twiddling occured while they spun everything down.

An ultrasound was used to guide the needle into my shredded, bulging mensicus in two separate spot and the rest of the volume went into the joint space with hopes of regrowing some of the cartilage under the kneecap (where there basically isn't any.)

I won't lie. It hurt. Imagine a slow push of the needle into the side of your knee joint and injecting battery acid. It creates a slow painful burn that make your leg muscle want to clench and spasm. Remove, and repeat twice more.

That was two hours ago. Currently my knee is NOT happy about bending and although the cramped muscle has died back some, there's still an awful lot of burning ache. The short term prognosis is 2-3 days of hellish ache + crutches, then it shoudl begin to improve. I'm not holding my breath on it happening that fast.

2011-06-26T09:51:00.000-07:00

SIDE EFFECTS OR BROKEN LIGHTS
Given the heading on this blog, this is probably going to be odder than you think. My kids are on the neighborhood swim team, which is interesting, frustrating, hot and sticky, and involves sleep deprivation on my part. The pool they are supposed to practice in has this thing going on where the underwater lights are currently non functional. That probably sounds like no big deal but- somehow this translates to no night swim practice and with my 2nd shift style schedule, we can't make the morning ones. Sooooo I've been dragging child 1 and child 2 to rec center (as mentioned in a previous post) and doing laps pretty much right along with them. I'm over a hundred laps so far in the past 2 months. Does this qualify as slightly involuntary boot camp on my part?

2011-06-24T09:17:00.000-07:00

NEW RELEASE COMING SOON

I have a new story - "Just Breathe" coming out at Shadowfire Press pretty soon. I'll be running a contest to win a $5 gift certificate to SFP in the very near future.

2011-06-22T08:51:00.000-07:00

A MONTH IN HELL
I'd like to blame swim team or my job or my kids or somebody but the truth is I volunteered for this, well sort of anyway. I'm getting a platelet rich plasma injection in my wrecked knee next week. Hopefully a month from now the pay off will be less pain and greater endurance for that knee. In the meantime- I have to swear off all anti-inflammatory/ aspirin/Nsaids for an entire week before the procedure and I'm led to believe 2 weeks after. The pain has already begun.

Excedrin and Voltaren are my first line of defense. If I can get them in my system fast enough, sometimes I can short circuit the need for anything more epic. Currently - not happening. Prodrome sucks. I knew the migraine was coming sometime yesterday. It was threatening me. Today I'm courting the messed up vision in one eye and the ice pick at the base of my skull. I also have to go to work in a while, so my only viable options for the pain at the moment are "verbotten."

My record for non-stop migraine pain is 11 days. I'm really hoping I don't exceed that record.

2011-06-16T10:19:00.000-07:00

HAVING NO CHILDREN APPARENTLY ALLOWS YOU TO GET AWAY WITH BEING A BITCH

I homeschool my children, ages 8 and 12. We use the pool to do laps at times that other children are typically in school. Due to the closure of Kempsville’s pool for maintenance, we had been using Bow Creek, which was extremely pleasant and problem-free but not as close to our home. I took my children to Kempsville today and spent roughly 30 minutes doing laps with them without a problem – until another adult woman arrived and appeared to be extremely agitated that there were children in the lap lane. As I approached the end of the pool where she stood, I assured her that my children and I were very nearly done. Apparently this was insufficient. She went to the pool office and lodged a complaint. A female lifeguard came to the lane and informed us that we must obey the circular swim to the absolute letter and no deviations of any kind were allowed.

How stupid do you think I am? It was freaking obvious the bitch wanted us gone and since my kids were not horsing around or harrassing the few other people in the pool in any way, the lifeguard had to dream up some reason to make our lives miserable and get us to leave. If after the very first lap, some lifeguard had come to complain, I wouldn't have been happy but I would have coped. But NO! We swim ten laps a piece with nary a word until this other moron shows up.

I was pissed(still am) I spoke with some woman in the pool office who gave me some extremely lame comment about rules, (that obviously only apply when they want them to.) I also spoke to one of the female supervisors at the Center but she was unable to offer any resolution or apology for this behavior. (Read this - I'm not worth the effort cuz I'm just some weirdo that homeschools my kids) I sent an email to the city department of parks and rec (Like that's gonna do a fat lot of good - but hey I'm working my way up the food chain to complain.) I also have thoughts of sending the complaint to one of the city council people. After all I'm a tax playing resident and the rec centers are mostly a city funded project.

2011-06-13T08:42:00.000-07:00

25 YEARS LATER AND REMEMBERING WHY

So I hooked up with 2 of my best friends from college at the reunion. During those 4 years at school we shared lasagna, deep philosophical discussions, a love of all things sci-fi and geeky, chocolate, and writing. This weekend we caught up on marriages and divorces and kids and family and all the things we've never given up. Techno-geeks that we are, one friend mentioned using a digital recorder and downloading to Dragon to get get printed version of notes. The other two of us never batted an eye. We knew exactly what she meant. Two of us are published, abeit one in fiction and the other poetry, the third has plans for getting published. Two of us have a pair of children, the other a beloved nice and nephew. What's that phrase? The more things change, the more the stay the same. We're older, we're grayer, and we all have more demands on our time, but in essense we are still the same people who became friends long ago. If we met fresh this year, and had never known each other before, there's a really good bet we'd be friends all over again. Here's to 25 more years.

2011-06-10T08:03:00.001-07:00

LOOKING BACK 25 YEARS
My college reunion is this weekend, and I have to say I'm kind of psyched. I made some very good friends during those 4 years and have recently been back in touch with a few "lost" ones via the infamous facebook.

I majored in biochemistry back then and lo and behold I have a career (albeit part-time) that makes direct and specific use of that degree - teaching chem at a community college. I did a moderate amount of writing back then too, without any real hopes every being published. I indulged in 2 am ice cream runs with my roommate, went to scifi cons with some other friends, met a guy and married him 2 months after graduation (That one blew up in my face a few years later.) I fenced avidly, I went spelunking, and watched naked guys streaking across the quad. I got drunk on Reunite (bad screw cap wine), wandered Baker Park in the dark and bought a ton of comic books. (Not all at the same time)

High school was 80% misery. College was 80% having a blast. Now, 25 years later, I look back. I have precious few regrets regarding those years. I studied hard, but I played hard too. Here's to 25 more years of adding to to my been there/ done that list.

2011-06-08T09:44:00.000-07:00

CHILDHOOD BOOKS
Reading out loud to my kids is one of our "school" lessons. In the past couple of years, I've mostly taken to reading books I really loved when I was a kid. We made our way through several of the Laura Ingalls Wilder books, followed by Alice in Wonderland. The latest is The Secret Garden.
I'm finding it interesting to see perspectives as an adult that I totally missed as a kid. The average white middle class kid in the 70's (me) didn't really grasp the concept of Mary treating her native servants in India with incredible selfish disdain.

2011-06-02T07:36:00.000-07:00

INTENTIONAL MISTAKES
I'm in a minor quandry about something I'd guess you'd call writer's license. I'm most of the way through a new story and need to "fudge" some information about a state law in order to smooth the flow of the plot. Iowa requires a 3 day waiting period for a marriage license. I really want my characters to only have to wait one day. The OCD scientist facet of my brain is crying foul, and the purely creative part is pushing for the little fib. Since I'm still in the rough draft phase, I'm going with the fib at the moment. We'll see if this comes back to bite me.

2011-05-31T12:18:00.000-07:00

YEAR ROUND SCHOOL
My kids don't get a summer break. I know that probably sounds like an outrage to some but it's one of the choices we make regarding homeschooling. We do the school thing 12 months a year, with short breaks sprinkled in when suits the rest of our lives. Wanna spend 2 weeks out of the countryin May? No problem. Mom has to given exams to grown-ups? No school for a couple of days. 5 hour drive to see grandparents? Take your vocabulary workbook with you (Cause I'm evil and 5 straight hours of "game-boy" gives you square eyes) Unexpected playdate opportunity? No school today.

2011-05-24T07:48:00.000-07:00

PLOT PROBLEMS ABOUND

One of my latest work-in-progress stories is having plot sequence problems. This is the kind that makes you wish for either a magic wand or really big hammer. I've gotten about 10K into the amnesia guy story. (It's not exactly what it sounds like) and realized I have to reset a whole chunk of the timeline to make to flow with any sort of believability. Argh.

I'm already up to version 3 on this piece and I'm wondering it it's going to be one those that takes 8-10 revises to put all together.

2011-05-16T10:40:00.000-07:00

CIRCULAR STAIRWAY ETIQUETTE

Only in this country could I encounter this problem... I went to Gettysburg with the family and one of the thing we did there was climb up to the top of a tower that was probably 4-5 stories tall. Access to the rooftop area was up a traditional corkscrew-like circular stairway. I have hiked up and down what likely amounts to a thousand plus steps worth of these things in the UK and never had the problem I had in Gettyburg === rude stupid teenagers. I got about halfway up and was suddenly besieged by a hundred plus teenager tromping down of the top. I was trapped on a single step because nobody would pause move sideways or stop so I could pass. My wrecked knee was trembling and I had to cling to the center post to keep from being knocked down the stairs by the non-stop flood of assholes from some tour group. No bus load of British would ever be that effing clueless.

2011-05-12T10:04:00.000-07:00

AND THE WINNER IS
Kathyrn Scannell---- contact me at amyrmoler at gmail dot com to arrange "delivery of a copy of Braided Lives

2011-05-03T17:19:00.001-07:00

CONTEST
Leave me a comment and win a free copy of my latest novella on May 12th.

2011-05-02T09:19:00.000-07:00

NEW TORTURE FOR MY KNEE/LEG

The PT thing I've been doing for my knee doesn't seem to be helping much. I have this sneaking suspicion that because I'm just given pictures and told to "do these at home," that I've probably screwing it up. I seem to fall in the category of -takes forever and endless repetitions- to get a handle on physical stuff. Once I actually learn something, I'm good to go, but the learning part... enh...

So I have new torture device for my messed up and insanely tight IT band. (That's a band of tendon-ish connective tissue that runs from your hip down to the knee on the outside of your leg.) At the suggestion of another long term knee sufferer I bought a foam roller. It looks like a short chubby pool noodle. (And cost me a whopping $25) It's use involves me laying on the floor on my side with the thing jammed under my hip/outer thigh and I hold myself up a little and roll back and forth - so it puts pressure on the IT band.

You wouldn't think such an action could cause eye watering pain. In fact if I do it on the left leg (the basically undamaged one) it barely qualified as uncomfortable, just awkward. The right one ... oh lord... The up side to this, yes there is actually an up side, is that it loosens up the IT band enough that it hurts less when I'm up walking around. I am told that if I keep doing this for a number of weeks the pain level when I do it will back off. We'll see.

2011-04-28T07:44:00.000-07:00

I THINK THIS ONE SHOULD BE TITLED - COME HITHER

I'm in a mood today. My latest plot bunny is choking the crap out of me. What I've written doesn't seem to flow quite right, but on the other hand it's eating my brain at the same time. And I have edits to finish - with a deadline. Final exams are impending too, which means mad grading is going to have to occur. So today deserves - eye candy.

2011-04-23T12:58:00.002-07:00

THE ROUGH IS DONE

I finally finished the last few scenes of Like an Untimely Frost. It's the 3rd book in the SIS Case Files series. More menage, more danger, more .... zombies. Of course, it's got a ways to go. There's editting, and editting and tweaking and fluffing, but still---I'm happy to have all the plot together.

2011-04-20T08:04:00.000-07:00

AND THE WINNER IS
flchen1. You will be contacted to arranged emailing of a copy of Close to Home.

2011-04-14T11:17:00.000-07:00

WIN A COPY OF CLOSE TO HOME

Leave me a comment (and an email addy) and I'll get one of the short people in my house to pick a name on April 20th for a free copy.

2011-04-12T12:52:00.000-07:00

CLOSE TO HOME - NOW RELEASED AT PHAZE http://www.phaze.com/book.php?title=Close+to+Home A comtemporary menage piece

2011-04-09T09:44:00.000-07:00

NEW NOVELLA FROM TORQUERE PRESS Things are happily humming along on the release front for this. "Braided Lives" is a novella set in my Division P universe and will be coming out in May.

2011-04-07T06:11:00.000-07:00

NEARING THE END I don't do as many full novel length pieces as some authors, so finishing a long story is slightly a bigger deal. My latest WIP is the 3rd book in the SIS Case Files series. More mayhem. More angst. I've got just a few scenes left to write. Three (I think). If you don't write, you may wonder, how the hell can she only think it's probably 3 scenes. I don't necessarily write my plot sequnetially. In fact I seldom write something that long in the order in which it will later get read. Yeah, I sometimes do start at the beginning and plod along for a bit, but I usually get stuck somewhere and begin jumping around. In the finishing stages, I'm often left with a few gaps that may say or . Right now that's about where I am on this one.

2011-03-30T13:03:00.000-07:00

LIMITED REVIEW AND WHIPPING THROUGH THE PAGES My 8yr old "2nd grader" finished the end of the second grade math book a few days ago. Technically speaking she still has 3 more months of 2nd grade and since we "school" all summer that really translates to 5 months until she's a 3rd grader. We use the Saxon math texts as do an awful lot of other homeschoolers. I really like the series but like many math books the beginning of the text is basically a review. Sooooo, I have been making executive decisions and having her only do 3 or 4 problems per lesson plus the tests. We're up to lesson 12 in four days and so far have only encountered just one topic that's borderline new. So far she's missed exactly one problem in 12 lessons. Just think if this was public school... She would be bored out of her skull by endless repetitions of material she already knows. At the moment I'm guessing at the probablities of her finishing the 3rd grade book before 3rd grade even starts. At the moment I'll take 70% odds on her completing it.

2011-03-28T09:56:00.000-07:00

EDITS... AND MORE EDITS I have 47K words to edit by Friday. Edits are good, in that it means my stories are heading toward publication. Edits are evil in that they are mind numbing. Writing is the fun part. And the wrack your brain part. And the head banging part. In a magical world, I'd write the story and somebody else would go "poof", your story is perfect and exactly and precisely how you intended it be with no grammar errors and no WTF was that word actually supposed to say.

2011-03-27T10:26:00.000-07:00

BURNING UP THE KEYS I finished writing the rough for Just Breathe, a m/m contemporary. And I have only have 4 scenes left in - 0 to 165. And I managed 2 more scenes in the 3rd SIS novel.

2011-03-26T07:45:00.000-07:00

TRYING TO FINISH
Somehow I have managed to get myself in the odd position of having 3 nearly finished stories at once. I've got a full blown novel that's up to 43K, a novella that's over 30K and a shorter story that's merely needs some tweaking and a single scene.

Sooooooooooo, I'm running away. One night in a hotel by myself, just me and the laptop and nobody interupting me. I usually manage this feat once a year, often during spring break. (This year's spring break featured the evil dental work)

Fingers crossed, this will be a productive night.

2011-03-18T08:43:00.000-07:00

TEMPLATES AND MENUS AND JAVA (NOT THE GOOD KIND)
Argh. I'm still hacking away at trying to get my website set up. I bought this template based tool from the provider, which you'd think should make life fairly easy for those of us who are "programming impaired". Enh... Not so much. Yes I have 5 pages actually in existence. You know the routine- a home page and then the ones that hive off of it. They are sort of organized, as in not blank at this point. I'm slowly getting buy links installed. Now that I have 3 different publishers I figure that's a pretty important feature. But I haven't gotten the blurbs copied for most of the pieces.

2011-03-15T06:35:00.000-07:00

I HAZ A WEBSITE ;-)

At long last I've begun to set up a website. ---http://armoler.com/ Right now it doesn't look like much of anything (sigh). It'll probably take me at least a couple of weeks to get it set up. The goal is put hot links to all my stories there, especially since I now have 3 publishers. And I have intentions of putting up at least one free read as soon as I figure out how.

2011-03-14T07:54:00.001-07:00

JUST NICE

It's been a while since I posted a hawt naked guy pic so..... oogle away.

2011-03-10T07:30:00.000-08:00

NITROUS OXIDE ZONE
I finally got the damn dental work done, narrowly avoiding needing a root canal. There was however insane amounts of drilling. Shudder. In an effort to control my phobic tendencies, I did the nitrous oxide thing. Yes I used the word "did" on purpose. It ranks up there with doing shots of tequila. The experience ranks up there as just a little creepy in the I am trashed out of my mind sort of way. Take - the whole room is slightly spinning and just a little too bright- that I have experienced on the rare occasions when I drank A LOT, and add the - I might fall asleep 'cept that doesn't exactly seem like a good idea- that dilaudid causes (I've had dilaudid a couple times for insane migraines) Add just a thread of paranoia because I'm not so totally "gone" that I've forgotten about the drilling part. Every little while I'd get just wierded out enough to stop breathing through the funky Darth Vader attachment over my nose and inhale a few good gulps of just air through my mouth.

Something like an hour and half of drilling later, I was done with the crown thing and my mouth tasted like blood and 5 minute epoxy and my jaw was already starting to really ache. I think the nitrous altered my time perception to a degree. Even though I was aware that drilling and drilling and drilling was going on, sometimes I was listening to the radio in the background and all the conversations between the dentist and the tech and the couple of people who wandered down the hallway. If I have to have major insane amounts of dental work again, I'd defintely consider doing the nitrous again.

Now I just have to recover from the fact my jaw was partly dislocated (again) and the fact I can barely open my mouth and chewing of any kind is a definite no-no.

2011-03-06T07:46:00.000-08:00

NEW PIECE COMING OUT
I have a new menage piece coming out with Phaze. Close to Home is tenatively scheduled for release on March 21st.

2011-03-02T10:17:00.000-08:00

NEW LEVELS OF STUPIDITY

I tried to have dental work done. The operative word being tried. The chick in the dental office took my blood pressure and proceeded to freak because it was high. Yeah ... and I'm about the submit to 2+ hrs of utter torture voluntarily... You'd think they'd never heard of dental phobia. It took then nearly 3 weeks of jerking me around to set up this appt to start with.

The dentist bimbo proceeded to have her little utter freak out and starts quoting AMA regs and talking about how she can't possibly touch me because I must have some deep medical problem because nobody ever has blood pressure that high because they're afraid. Obviously this woman has never ever heard of the fight or flight response.

She wouldn't let me get up and walk around (because that might have actually calmed me down). And babbled/ blathered some more shit about I'd have to go see a dr and even then there was no guarantee she could even do anything because my drug allergies were just so horrrible that I was just such a risk yadayadayadayada....

By this point, I have switched from terrified to pissed. And I told them I was leaving and would get some other dentist to do the work. THEN she had the nerve to get mad!

It all boils down to dental bitch being terrified of litigation if something didn't go according to plan. And really if she is so fucking afraid that tells me her "MD" skills behind that dental degree aren't worth the paper they're printed on.

2011-03-01T09:42:00.000-08:00

SPIRALING TOWARD THE IMPLOSION
Dental work---> Car problems in the middle of nowhere ---> ER trip ---> Bronchitis ---> Bronchitis WITH a migraine (oh that was fun) ----> tomorrow..... ? My best guess is something on the order of getting hit by a bus.

2011-02-25T20:25:00.000-08:00

TRAVEL DRAMA
The gods of travel hate me. The weekend my editor and I are attending a convention in Roanoke called MystiCon. This involves driving 250 miles. You'd think that this should be a fairly straight forward endeavor for 2 adults. Er.. ummm ... not so much. Around about Farmville (aka not quite exactly the middle of nowhere, some guy in an SUV passes us and flags us to open the window, and tells us he thinks we're leaking gas. Now I'm not stupid enough to pull over right there. I did however take the next exit and pull into a ghas station with a convenience store and lots of people.

Once I got out of the van, I saw the puddle forming under the vehicle. I know next to nothing about car parts but Susan does and she discovered a leaking fuel line where it had pulled loose from an attachment. Using a paperclip and some pliers she managed to put it together enough to get us the 2 miles down the road to an auto parts store. She is amazing. I bought the needed piece and she got it attached.

The gods of GPS hate me too. Neither of us had been to Roanoke this century and we were relying on the high tech gadget to get us there. Somewhere in the next 50 miles of teeeny tiny twisty mountain roads and sheer drop offs, we started making jokes about "Deliverance" and banjo music.

Eight hours later we arrived.

2011-02-20T08:12:00.000-08:00

CRANKING THROUGH THE WORDS
I'm grinding through the last quarter of my 3rd SIS Case Files novel. I'm up to almost 42K words and the end is sort of in sight. In the meantime I have edits to do on another menage piece that is under contract with Phaze. It's called -Close to Home- and I think may be slated for release sometime in March.

2011-02-13T07:39:00.000-08:00

AND THE WINNER IS...
mountie123--- Please contact me at amyrmoler@gmail.com to arrange delivery of your copy of Tabled Discussions.

2011-02-11T19:09:00.000-08:00

I CANNOT CATCH A BREAK

I went to the dentist today for a scraping and chiseling appointment (known in some circles as a cleaning). In between the tiny ice picks and the flying blood and the pain, the dentist told me I need another crown. Fuck. I admit it, I cried, literally. I hate going to the dentist so ungodly much. I generally shake so hard my stomach and leg muscles hurt. I have never a "good" appt in my adult life and knowing that I am going to spend days in nearly unbearable pain 2 weeks from now is not improving my mood. The last crown installation dislocated my jaw. I spent somewhere between 4 and 5 days basically unable to open mouth more than a fraction or chew. It took a trip to my chiropractor guy to put it back in place. At least then I only had to deal with the pain of the dental work itself.

In the meantime, I get to spend this weekend in pain and unable to chew also. I am generally guaranteed at least 48 hrs of liquid diet after any cleaning. I am having one of those moments when I really kind of almost wonder why I go at all. Even when I go pretty faithfully, it doesn't help. All it does is increase the number of days a year my mouth hurts.

2011-02-06T17:26:00.000-08:00

IT NEVER GOES AWAY
Okay, I'm having one of those "gotta rant" moments. I'm an information junkie, and being so has helped me solved my medical problems way more than once. I've been cruising an info board for people with knee problems for a number of weeks now and I want to grab certain people and choke them. I keep reading these -oh you had an injury/surgery/both- posts and people burbling onward about how they're fixed and exactly how well everything went etc etc. Today it was some mother who wants info about how long til her son's wrecked knee is normal and he doesn't have to think about it.
I want to scream to someone's face. Guess that's going to be here. The answer = NEVER. My meniscus got trashed when I was 13 years old. I have had to live with pain/ find funky ways to avoid certain motions/realize that running =cruthces for basically my entire life.
I have also been spelunking, rock climbing, ride a motorcycle, taken karate, taken judo, fenced, and walked some 1500 recorded miles (in the past decade).
There is very little that I wanted to do but haven't attempted. That said- every single decision has involved my willingness to deal with the consequences. Today I rode my motorcycle. Tonight it hurts like fuck all. I got my endorphin rush for the afternoon. Tonight I pay.

There is also very little that has ever gone "right" about my knee treatments. There was no RICE back when injury #1 happened. I spent some weeks on crutches. I was never offered anything any more powerful than a tylenol for the pain. Not the kind with codeine either. Nobody ever suggested ice. Just ace bandages. By the time injury #2 rolled around, ice was actually suggested ( but only after surgery). I was given a few tablets of demerol (post-surgery)to take and told to make them last, because that's all I was ever going to get. None of the "keep on top the pain so it doesn't overwhelm you" that I keep hearing from people on the knee board. That was never an option. Ever. The pain was so bad I was sleeping 2 hrs a night for nearly 6 months.

So we're on to injury # 3. My accupuncture guy is only one who has offered any help, but what he can offer somewhat limited (licensure and all that sort of thing) I keep floundering through the system looking for somebody with a clue.

2011-02-05T09:41:00.000-08:00

GREAT MOMENTS IN MISREADING
Apparently certain words reside in my subconscious to pop up at inopportune and mystifying times. You know how Facebook always always has a handful of ads down the side? Today I read - Gilette Venus Foreskin. Huh? WTF? I blame insufficient caffeine and small print. It actually said -Proskin-.

2011-02-02T08:51:00.000-08:00

TABLED DISCUSSIONS COMING OUT SOON
Leave me a comment and you could win a free copy of my latest episode in the Inches of Trust series. It's called -Tabled Discussions.

Brian Townsend is looking forward to the weekend. He and his lover, Tristan Blake, are finally going to use the weekend reservations at a popular B&B that Tristan had given Brian for Christmas. It’s not quite Valentines Day, but Brian has packed a few extras to make their weekend special. The timing is excellent because Tristan’s job as a homicide detective has made it difficult for the two men to spend time together lately. Sometimes though, old baggage can interpose itself despite the best intentions of everyone concerned. Some wounds just take longer than a day or two to heal--even with a large dose of love and patience. Brian isn’t going to let go, but how far will Tristan let him in this time?

2011-01-26T09:44:00.000-08:00

MORE KNEE SAGA
I finally made it to see another ortho. At least this guy was polite and relatively sane, if ultimately not a lot of help. He agreed with me that it's possible I have yet another meniscus tear (on top of tons of previous damage and a helping of arthritis) The MRI can't differentiate between new damage and what could be scar tissue. Only a slice and dice and peek inside can do that--- and I'm not willing to go that route yet. The last time I let somebody do that, it did nothing to help the pain. Statistics bear me out that if you're only doing a "scope" because you're not exactly sure what wrong- the outcome is usually pretty pathetic.

I'm plowing onward through the misery of PT (It may help). But I think PRP is my best shot. PRP stands for Platelet Rich Plasma. The idea is if you suck a hundred mls of a patient's own blood out and spin away all the RBC's and such, you're left with liquid high in platelet count and some other growth/healing factors. The FDA is still calling it "experimental" but I've run across some really decent journal articles that support it's use for both meniscus damage and arthritis. My rationale = if I try it and it doesn't work - I'm really only out some time and chunk of money. The chances of it making it worse are slim to none. After all, it's just MY blood products. If it doesn't help, I'm back to the choices of trying hyaluronic acid injections (which journal articles are saying is less effective than PRP) or the hack job. Sigh.

2011-01-22T09:51:00.000-08:00

TABLED DISCUSSIONS & MORE CAM AND MASON

I have a new Inches of Trust story coming out sometime next month. I'm not sure of the date yet. It's called Tabled Discussions. I'll be posting info for a winning a free copy here in the next few days.

If you happen to be a fan of the Cam Bradshaw/Mason Flynn characters, I'm already 17K words into a new story about those two. I'm not really sure how long the story will be when I'm done but 20K is pretty much guaranteed and possibly quite a bit longer.

2011-01-21T08:38:00.000-08:00

IF IT WEREN'T FOR BAD LUCK, I'D HAVE NO LUCK AT ALL
Isn't that a quote from some song? PT is not getting much better. Obviously my folder must say "psycho-bitch" somewhere in the records because these people basically treat me like crap. The dude who gives me orders in the pool wants no information whatsoever about what I have done in the past/am capable of doing at home. He basically told me I was lying when I mentioned the 90 cobra pushups. PT in the pool appointments are supposed to be 25 minutes long. Yesterday, I was conveniently forgotten until about 8 minutes into that very small amount of time and then some random guy in the hallway was told to get me started. I did the exercise stuff in the pool for about 16 minutes then some teeny tiny little old lady with a walker showed up with her nurse's aide chick in tow and I was immediately told I was done, even though my time slot wasn't over yet. WTF?

Granted PT makes me hurt ...but isn't that the goal? In part because I have wierd muscle weakness issues from the latest injury. Skimping on the PT is unlikely to improve my knee. I'm sure they're planning on billing my insurance for that visit regardless of seriously short changing me.

2011-01-14T11:52:00.000-08:00

MORE EXERCISES IN THERMODYNAMICS

You cannot win.
You cannot break even.
You cannot get out of the game.

This is just so fucking appropriate for anything even remotely connected to my medical problems. I went to another PT, for an "assessment". This woman somehow developed an instant fixation on the idea that I have back issues and this is causing my knee pain. How she arrived at this conclusion based on 3 injuries, 1 surgery and 3 months of unrelenting pain I don't know.

Assessment doesn't usually conjour images of 80 to 90 yoga style cobra stretches and touching your toes 40-50 times when the injured part in the right knee. I have yet to figure out what BDSM Barbie's goal was. It went something like this - "Do 10. Does it hurt? Where? Okay, do 10 more? Did that make it better worse or the same? Do 10 more." This continued until I was visibly soaking my turtleneck with sweat. My take home instructions were to touch my toes 10x every 2 hrs. WTF?

I left the place shaking and in pain, with 4-5 hrs of work ahead of me (which equals standing). Less than 4 hrs after I left, it felt like somebody had tried to rip my head off, as pain radiated all down the back of my neck. Jeeezus Christ....

After a night of very little sleep, this morning I can barely turn my head, or lift my arms or bend my elbows. I had thought the previous PT experience was bad....

It hurts to fold laundry, it hurts to drive, it hurts just sitting here typing. I wonder if the premise of this little fiasco is that if she makes me hurt bad enough somewhere else maybe I'll forget my knee pain. I am NOT looking forward to next Tuesday, except for the purpose of telling the bimbo how utterly in agony I have been.

2011-01-10T16:49:00.000-08:00

VISUAL AIDS

I went back to the GP practice today, and I tried a new tactic. I used the purple sharpie I bought back in the summer for writing swim team events and heat numbers on my kids and used it on me. I drew lines marking where the pain started and which direction it radiated and what kind of pain (sharp/ burning/ache). I couldn't really tell if the doc was amused or not but I think it netted me a little cooperation.

After the whole fiasco with the psycho-bitch ortho, I now have a script for some different PT and I got "permission" to try taking my flurbiprofen twice a day every day for the next 2 weeks, instead of just when the pain level was making me crazy. The idea behind this = if I build up the antiflammatory meds in my system consistently for a few days, maybe some of the pain/inflammation will back down. (As I pointed out was the backing idea behind a number of journal articles I had read.)

Maybe, just maybe I'll make some more progress toward getting my knee approximately back to the place it was before October.

2011-01-10T13:32:00.000-08:00

AND THE WINNER IS---

mercedes791@live.com. - free copy of Auld Acquaintance.

2011-01-07T08:43:00.000-08:00

CAN I DELETE THIS WEEK FROM MY LIFE?

The migraine started at around 2 a.m. Oh isn't this just the capper for my week. Hole in my ceiling, asshat useless doctor, migraine. Insert javelin into right eye socket, push until it comes out the base the skull, twist, repeat. I have taken 3 different doses of meds so far and it's finally down to the level where I'm vertical and somewhat functional. Joy. What's next? At this point I'm just about expecting a semi to mysteriously impact the front of my house or a plane to fall out of the sky on top of me.

2011-01-06T11:46:00.000-08:00

SPITTING MAD
I'm about to blow a gasket- mad. After months of insurance fiasco and then the trip to England, I finally saw an orthopedic woman. God...what an amazing freaking waste of my time. I spent an hour and fifteen minutes there, 8 of which the woman actually saw to me. She told me I had arthritis in my right knee and some in my left. Yeah so? She then totally discounted the three injuries I've had over the decades, and informed me my only options were suck it up and deal with the pain or get my knee shot full of hyaluronic acid. Say what? I pointed out my TWO PAGE drug allegy list and she "offered" to let me bring an epi-pen with me. What moron of dr wants the possibility of a patient going into anaphylactic shock in their office?

She commented that my meniscus was fine. Huh what? I had a large chunk of my medial menscus REMOVED from my knee 20 years ago. In what fucking universe does that qualify as "fine"?? She also told me I was fat and would eventually need a knee replacement. Like I don't know I'm fat. I asked several times to try PT, it had helped back when injury number 2 occured. She proclaimed it was useless but I could go to the gym if I wanted to.

Basically this woman completely and totally blew me off. I am just some chubby middle aged woman with knee pain, big deal. It didn't seem to register that I'd dislocated my knee cap 2 months and that 's when the pain started. She didn't even comment on the 20 inch long knee brace I'd taken off for the X-rays or ask me what anti-inflammatories I'd even tried.

Suck it up and deal with the pain DOES NOT QUALIFY as treatment you bitch!

It took me 5 tries to find a sane neurologist. I guess it's going to take me an equal amount of time to find an ortho who has even a slight clue.

2011-01-03T18:07:00.000-08:00

VENTILATION

This little house remodel issue was not exactly planned. The original intention was to have the heat pump people do some maintenance on our system. Access to the upstairs portion of the heat pump requires crawling up through an access panel in the bedroom closet. Then you walk across the joists over to where the air handler thingy is.... unless you slip and end up stepping on the lightly drywalled ceiling.... And knock loose a 2 ft by 8 ft hunk and accompanying fluffy pink insulation down into the bedroom. Er, um, not exactly a good way to start the new year. I supposed it could have been worse. At least the HVAC guy didn't come crashing down out of the attic space along with the debris.

2011-01-01T09:09:00.000-08:00

#7 IN THE INCHES OF TRUST SERIES IS OUT

http://www.torquerebooks.com/index.php?main_page=product_info&products_id=2996

Leave me a comment and I'll be giving away a free copy on January 10.

2010-12-31T09:00:00.000-08:00

SEEING EYE HORSES

Okay, not really. But you have to admit they're wicked cute and don't even hardly come up to the guy's waist. We followed them down the street in Oxford on out way back to the train station. The guy leading them said he was taking them off to be in a Cinderella panto being held a ways down the block.

2010-12-29T10:45:00.000-08:00

OF NOT VERY HARD BOILED EGGS...
Today was the -go back to London day. This entailed an early morning shopping trip to pick up the last part of a gift for my 8 y.o. nephew and a mad dash to the post office for the mailing of 3 hefty boxes back to the states.

Afterward we collected all our crap from the flat and hiked down to the train station. There is apparently "work" going on with the railway system today/this week. Instead of having to negotiate 3 stops/ changeovers with all our luggage in tow, we ended up with 7.

If my knee was more functional- this would have been easier...but with my backpack and huge suitcase + the cane and the fact Morgan can't lift her suitcase up or down over the infamous gap between the train platform and the train itself. Err...umm... there was lots of awkward fumbling and dropping of things. Some of those things that got dropped were the food bag. We had a small host of leftovers from all the food shopping we had done over the past week. It includes some reputedly hard boiled eggs (made by DH). The kids like them and we didn't see the point in leaving them to get thrown out.

Back to the dropping part. I dropped the food bag in a misguided attempt to wrestle my suitcase and not do a face-plant on the sidewalk. One of the eggs rolled out. No biggie. It was rather cracked but we weren't going to eat the shell and there were no handy rubbish bins. I stuffed in in my pocket.

Fast forward about half an hour with more train changes and more luggage wrestling to having a few quiet minutes to snack in the first class coach of the train. I reached into my pocket....Eeeeewwwwww. There is a semi-disentegrated egg whose middle was a great deal less than hard boiled, leaking goop all over my ski glove and a receipt and the inside of my pocket. It took about 8 kleenex to clean up enough to cope. Guess that coat is going to have to get washed when we get home.

This ranks up there with the refrigerator disassembly fiasco several days earlier. I have had some of the most ludicrous problems this trip.

2010-12-28T13:15:00.000-08:00

CUTE NAKED DUDE

Yeah, yeah, he's made of bronze and is probably a couple of millenia old. We went to the Ashmolean in Oxford. The Ashmolean is sort of British Museum "lite". I'm sure there's somebody out there gagging in horror at the comparison. It's nifty, is covers vast time periods from anicient Iranian/Mesopotamian to some real god awful modern art. I am definitely not much of modern art fan.

2010-12-25T08:57:00.000-08:00

THE ROMAN BATHS

People have been using the natural hot springs in Bath for oh ...about 2500 years or so. The Romans, the Victorians and now the modern world.

The first pic is of the "pump room" in Bath. If you're a fan of the period romance that talks about the pump room and being seen...I was expecting something more interesting.

2010-12-25T08:54:00.000-08:00

The Interior of Bath Abbey
An epically beautiful place

2010-12-24T11:59:00.000-08:00

BATH ABBEY

There's been an abbey in Bath for 12 centuries. More than a millenium.

I'll get around to posting the pics of the inside shortly.

2010-12-24T11:52:00.000-08:00

BATH PART 2

A town with a heavy historic architecture legacy. We didn't get to see a whole lot of it the first day. Too much jet lag and cranky kids. But I went shopping. Power shopping. It's probably a miracle I didn't melt the numbers off the credit card. We had done exactly ZERO shopping for Xmas gifts prior to leaving the states. 99% of what can't easily be found in the US either. Win!

2010-12-24T11:46:00.000-08:00

BATH PART 1

So we aren't spending Christmas at home this year, instead we're in Bath, England. Here's a photo taken from train window as we headed from London to Bath. The UK's has a really amazing amount of snow this year, but although we saw a lot of it, it wasn't falling when we got there.
a

2010-12-23T04:56:00.000-08:00

NOT TOO FOND OF US AIR
We flew out of Norfolk, which considering how close to Xmas it is, was not as crowded as I had feared. Apparently I look like a terrorist though... I got treated to the great joy of a pat down. At least it was a woman.

US Air apparently doesn't do pre-bordering for anyone other than people with infants. So me and my knee brace and cane, struggled up the aisle for the first flight. It was blissfully short, that's pretty much all I'll grant that part.

We took off for the long flight from Charlotte. I'd never been through that airport before. (They have Cinnabon....) No pre-bordering for those of us who are slow this time either. That included the college-age looking guy on crutches, who fumbled his way down the narrow aisles just like me. The cheap seats never have a generous amount of foot room to start with, but this plane has less than half of what I'm used to. My backpack wouldn't fit under the seat in front of me and had to be stowed overhead.

Halfway thru the flight we hit turbulence (not that the pilot called it that...) and people began to get sick. I watched one woman waiting for the bathroom be violently and spectacularly sick in her "bag". Then Rowan barfed. (my 11 y.o.) And when Phill pushed the call button to see if he could get another bag- a plane wide announcement was made that "flight attendants cannot help you unless it is a medical emergency". Some kind lady ahead of Phill gave him the one in her seat. Gee a kid barfs, and you won't give him another barf bag? Really? Do you want the next spew all over the floor?

Then Morgan got sick. After a little while I went to ask the flight attendant asshole where I should throw it away. And could I please get another one. He gave me some song and dance about how I had to double bag it and dispose of it in the bathroom because he wasn't touching it. And no he couldn't possibly give me another barf bag. I was way tempted to drop it on the floor in front of him and just leave.

Do these morons have a clue? I can't possibly be the first parent with motion sick kids. I wonder what kind of wicked shit response the poor woman got.

There was supposed to a wheelchair waiting for at Gatwick. Nada. So I had to hike my ass the half a mile to the other end of the building to go through customs. (And so did the guy on crutches). US Air sucks big time. And I'm doomed to fly home on them.